I Miss You: a First Look at Death Paperback – Illustrated, 18 January 2001
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- Language : English
- Paperback : 32 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0764117645
- ISBN-13 : 978-0764117640
- Reading age : 4 - 7 years
- Best Sellers Rank: 26,291 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer reviews:
About the Author
Pat Thomas is an author, journalist, and campaigner specializing in the field of environment and health. She qualified as a transpersonal psychotherapist in 1991 at the Centre for Psychotherapy and Counselling Education in London. She currently lives in London, England.
I MISS YOU
A First Look at Death
Books in the “First Look At…series promote interaction among children, parents, and teachers on social, health, and emotional issues.
This reassuring picture book explores the difficult issue of death for young children. Children's feelings and questions about this sensitive subject are looked at in a simple but realistic way. This book helps them to understand their loss and to come to terms with their feelings.
From the book:
- Every day someone is born...and every day someone dies. Death is a natural part of life. All living things grow, change, and eventually die.
- When someone you love dies it can feel as if your heart has been torn in two. It can feel as if a part of you is missing.
- As time goes on you will realize that no one is completely gone as long as you can remember the one you love.
How To Use This Book
Children need to feel that they participated in the grieving that goes on after the death of someone close. If possible, try to encourage the child to make something for the person who has passed away that might be included in the burial ceremony. Or, if old enough, let them read a poem at the funeral.
When a family member dies, it can be very difficult for all members of the family to express their feelings. Sometimes parents get so caught up in their own grief that they forget that their children are grieving too. Try to remember that you are all in this together and that you need each other's support. Death, especially if it is untimely, is difficult for adults to make sense of. It is even harder for children, who have much less experience in the world.
If the child is your own or close to you, then let them see you grieving. This is how they learn about handling grief. If they see you hiding grief away, that is what they will do. If they see you allowing grief to be a part of your life, then they too will be able to allow themselves to grieve.
Allow Them to Be Sad
Let children mourn in your presence without the need for it to make sense. And allow them to be sad without giving in to your natural inclination to make everything better.
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Most helpful customer reviews on Amazon.com
I ordered a few books for her about death, or that claimed to be. This by far was the best. The others beat around the bush or used the death of a pet to explain it, but this book presented all the information in a thourough yet age appropriate manner.
I loved that there is no mention of heaven or floating in the sky. It's an honest description of what happens when your body stops working. Highly recommended.
I highly recommend this book for anyone struggling with how to help their children deal with their grief. Warning, you will probably need tissues as you read through the book, but it is a good way to get both of you talking about your feelings at a very difficult time.
It brought up concepts of different beliefs, including angels. It wasn't overly religious, but I feel like other books have handled this better.
The section on feeling guilt is probably relevant for some kids, but not everyone so it made it difficult to connect to I think.
It opens up a lot of important discussions, but just didn't work for our needs right now.