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My personal therapist recommended this book as we have been working for about two years on my 'mother issues'. There were many 'light bulb' moments for me as I read the book: Jasmin Lee Cori sensitively takes you through some painful issues and makes helpful connections and observations which really do help to heal childhood emotional neglect. There were times when I laughed out loud as it felt to me like the author knew my mum! I use sticky markers each time I find really helpful/useful text; my test of a 'good book' is how many markers I use. If you look at the picture you will see that this book if packed with helpful/useful text! I would like to thank the author for writing such a helpful and insightful book.
This might sound overly dramatic. But I feel like this book saved my life. There's no words to explain just how much I needed to hear what was written in this book. Especially from someone neutral without a hidden agenda. It felt as though this book was written directly to me. I kept thinking how do you know me and my mother? Lol. It literally all applied to me.
It's probably worth noting that this book doesn't actually have the resources to heal you, although it does have some useful exercises. What it does do however is lay out the blueprint of what would help (certain types of therapies primarily done with a psychotherapist), which gives you a good starting point on next steps. Having said that, just gaining a better understanding of myself and my childhood was partially healing in itself.
Being a mother to a young child, this also helped me have more confidence in how I am raising her.
I've done a number of short course therapies, cbt, groups, etc and whilst those kinds of courses certainly have their places for more superficial (not used in a derogatory way) problems, I feel rather than tackling specific traumas and giving coping skills as these courses do, it's probably worth finding out whether a person has the foundation needed to even begin to tackle more recent traumas and actually deal with root problems rather than just giving coping skills, which in my opinion is a akin to simply putting a bandaid over the wound. All this time I've spent in therapy and not once have we gone into this stuff. Therefore I've not felt any better. NHS mental health has a lot to answer for.
But moving on... this is a seriously amazing book. If you have mum issues and the concept is new to you, you won't regret buying it. Only reason why it's not 5 stars is because I'd have liked more exercises. Simply because booking some sessions with the author isn't an option, so to me that's the next best thing.
Wow. I'm completely blown away. Read in one day and it was like the author had been inside my head and explained to me what was there and why. I no longer feel a stranger to myself and understand what I'm missing that most people aren't and that it's not our fault, we're not broken and can heal after finding the cause of our wounds. Anyone with a difficult relationship with mother, please buy you will not regret.
A brilliant and eye opening book if you have been through a childhood like that. Highly recommended - I buy it for anyone I discover who suffered similar issues due to unavailable parents for whatever reason (commonly alcohol or mental health issues) which stopped them being present for their children.
My mum destroyed me, this book showed me that. I didn't have to stay destroyed, the book showed me that too. I have remothered myself, and learned how lovable and wonderful I am, while also understanding why my mother couldn't be good enough. I recommend to everyone, especially if you have a hard time maintaining healthy relationships.
This put so many peaces together for me it's unbelievable. I really needed this book to understand me and why I am the way I am. Definitely helped me along my recovery to really nurture my inner child! :D